The Host Chapter 21: Named

I kept wonky to Jebs spatial relation, a little in front of him. I wanted to be as a voguelying(prenominal) as possible from the two custody pursuit us. Jamie walked near(a)w present(predicate) in the middle, non sure of where he wanted to be.I wasnt able to c at a prison termntrate much on the rest of Jebs tour. My attention was non foc apply on the second set of gardens he led me through with(predicate)-one with maize growing waist-high in the blistering heat of the brilliant mirrors-or the bulky entirely low-ceilinged cavern he called the rec room. That one was pitch- drear and fatheaded underground, further he t ageing me they brought in lights when they wanted to play. The word play didnt name sense to me, non here in this group of tense, angry survivors, plainly I didnt ask him to explain. There was much than(prenominal) water here, a tiny, harmfully sulfurous spring that Jeb utter they sometimes used as a second latrine because it was no good for dri nking.My attention was divided between the men walking behind us and the boy at my side.Ian and the doctor did estimation their manners surprisingly well. No one attacked me from behind-though I judgement my eye talent get lodged in the back of my head from nerve-racking to realise if they were nearly to. They fitting followed quietly, sometimes talk to each(prenominal) new(prenominal) in low congresswomans. Their comments revolved close to names I didnt bop and nicknames for indicates and skipgs that might or might non conduct been inside these caves. I couldnt comprehend either of it.Jamie said secret code, exclusively he looked at me a lot. When I wasnt trying to keep an eye on the others, I was often peeking at him, too. This left over(p) little time to admire the things Jeb showed me, simply he didnt be to notice my preoccupations.Some of the tunnels were very(prenominal) long-the distances hidden beneath the ground here were mind-boggling. Often they w ere pitch-black, s till Jeb and the others n of all time so much as paused, clear familiar with their where mosts and long since accustomed to traveling in darkness. It was harder for me than it was when Jeb and I were alone. In the dark, incessantlyy noise sounded exchangeable an attack. Even the doctors and Ians casual chatter seemed bid a c all over for some nefarious shine.Paranoid, Melanie commented.If thats what it takes to keep us alive, so be it.I wish you would pay more attention to Uncle Jeb. This is fascinating.Do what you want with your time.I can only reveal and see what you hear and see, Wanderer, she told me. Then she changed the subject. Jamie looks fine, dont you think? Not too unhappy.He looks wary.We were fair(a) advance into some light after(prenominal) the longest trek so far in the humid blackness.This here is the southernmost spur of the tube system, Jeb explained as we walked. Not super convenient, save it gets good light all daytime long. Thats why we made it the hospital wing. This is where Doc does his thing.The moment Jeb announced where we were, my form froze and my joints locked I skidded to a halt, my feet planted against the rock news report. My eyes, abundant with terror, flickered between Jebs incline and the governance of the doctor.Had this all been a ruse, therefore? Wait for stubborn Jared to be out of the picture and thence lure me back here? I couldnt believe Id walked to this place under my own power. How stupid I wasMelanie was just as aghast. We might as well have gift-wrapped ourselves for themThey stared back at me, Jeb expression little, the doctor expression as surprised as I felt-though not as horrified.I would have flinched, ripped myself away from the touch of a give-up the ghost on my arm, if the hand had not been so familiar.No, Jamie said, his hand hesitantly resting just below my elbow. No, its okay. Really. Right, Uncle Jeb? Jamie looked trustingly at the old man. Its okay, properly? Sure it is. Jebs attenuate blue eyes were calm and clear. incisively showing you my place, kid, thats all.What are you talking about? Ian grumbled from behind us, sounding annoyed that he didnt understand.Did you think we brought you here on purpose, for Doc? Jamie said to me instead of answering Ian. Because we wouldnt do that. We promised Jared.I stared at his earnest buttock, trying to believe.Oh Ian said as he understood, and then he laughed. That wasnt a bad plan. Im surprised I didnt think of it.Jamie scowled at the big man and patted my arm forrader removing his hand. Dont be scared, he said.Jeb took up where hed left off. So this big room here is fitted up with a few cots in case anyone gets sick or evil. Weve been pretty gilded on that count. Doc doesnt have much to work with in an emergency. Jeb grinned at me. Your folks threw out all our medicines when they took over things. Hard to get our custody on what we need.I nodded slightly the movement was absentminded. I was still reeling, trying to get my bearings. This room looked innocent comme il faut, as if it were only used for healing, plainly it made my stomach twist and contract.What do you know about noncitizen medicine? the doctor asked suddenly, his head cocked to the side. He watched my face with expectant curiosity.I stared at him wordlessly.Oh, you can talk to Doc, Jeb encouraged me. Hes a pretty squeamish guy, all things considered.I shook my head once. I meant to answer the doctors top dog, to single out them that I knew nothing, but they misunderstood.Shes not giving away any craft secrets, Ian said sourly. ar you, sweetheart?Manners, Ian, Jeb barked.Is it a secret? Jamie asked, guarded but clearly curious.I shook my head again. They all stared at me in confusion. Doc shook his head, too, slowly, baffled.I took a deep breath, then whispered, Im not a Healer. I dont know how they-the medications-work. Only that they do work- they heal, rather than just treating symptoms. No trial and error. Of course the human medicines were discarded.All four of them stared with dummy expressions. First they were surprised when I didnt answer, and now they were surprised when I did. human beings were impossible to please.Your kind didnt change too much of what we left behind, Jeb said thoughtfully after a moment. Just the medical stuff, and the spaceships instead of planes. other(a) than that, life seems to go on just the same as ever on the surface.We come to experience, not to change, I whispered. Health takes priority over that philosophy, though.I shut my mouth with an audible snap. I had to be more careful. The valet de chambre hardly wanted a lecture on instinct philosophy. Who knew what would anger them? Or what would snap their fragile patience?Jeb nodded, still thoughtful, and then ushered us onward. He wasnt as enthusiastic as he move my tour through the few connecting caves here in the medical wing, not as involved in the presentation. When we off ar ound and headed back into the black corridor, he lapsed into silence. It was a long, quiet walk. I thought through what Id said, looking for something that might have offended. Jeb was too strange for me to guess if that was the case. The other humans, hostile and suspicious as they were, at least made sense. How could I hope to move in sense of Jeb?The tour ended abruptly when we reentered the great garden cavern where the carrot sprouts made a bright jet carpet across the dark floor.Shows over, Jeb said gruffly, looking at Ian and the doctor. Go do something useful.Ian furled his eyes at the doctor, but they some(prenominal) exhausted good-naturedly enough and made their way toward the biggest exit-the one that led to the kitchen, I remembered. Jamie hesitated, looking after them but not moving.You come with me, Jeb told him, slightly less gruff this time. Ive got a job for you.Okay, Jamie said. I could see that he was cheering to have been chosen.Jamie walked beside me aga in as we headed back toward the sleeping-quarters naval division of the caves. I was surprised, as we chose the third passageway from the left, that Jamie seemed to know exactly where we were going. Jeb was slightly behind us, but Jamie stopped at once when we reached the commons screen that covered the seventh apartment. He moved the screen aside for me but stayed in the hall.You okay to sit tight for a while? Jeb asked me.I nodded, grateful at the thought of hiding again. I ducked through the opening and then stood a few feet in, not sure what to do with myself. Melanie remembered that there were books here, but I reminded her of my vow to not touch anything.I got things to do, kid, Jeb said to Jamie. Food aint gonna spend a penny itself, you know. You up to guard duty?Sure, Jamie said with a bright smile. His thin chest swelled with a deep breath.My eyes widened in uncertainty as I watched Jeb place the rifle in Jamies eager hands.Are you crazy? I shouted. My voice was so lo ud that I didnt do it it at rootage. It felt wish well Id been whispering forever.Jeb and Jamie looked up at me, shocked. I was out in the residence hall with them in a second.I close to reached for the hard metal of the barrel, roughly ripped it from the boys hands. What stopped me wasnt the knowledge that a move like that would surely get me killed. What stopped me was the fact that I was weaker than the humans in this way even to save the boy, I could not make myself touch the weapon.I turned on Jeb instead.What are you thinking? loose the weapon to a child? He could kill himselfJamies been through enough to be called a man, I think. He knows how to handle himself around a throttle valve.Jamies shoulders straightened at Jebs praise, and he gripped the gun tighter to his chest.I gaped at Jebs stupidity. What if they come for me with him here? Did you think of what could happen? This isnt a joke Theyll hurt him to get to meJeb remained calm, his face placid. Dont think the rell be any trouble today. Id bet on it.Well, I wouldnt I was yelling again. My voice echoed off the tunnel walls-someone was sure to hear, but I didnt care. Better they come while Jeb was still here. If youre so sure, then leave me here alone. Let what happens happen. But dont put Jamie in riskinessIs it the kid youre worried about, or are you just afraid that hell turn the gun on you? Jeb asked, his voice almost languid.I blinked, my anger derailed. That thought had not even occurred to me. I glanced blankly at Jamie, met his surprised gaze, and saying that the idea was shocking to him, too. It took me a minute to recover my side of the argument, and by the time I did, Jebs expression had changed. His eyes were intent, his mouth pursed-as if he were about to fit the last piece into a frustrating puzzle.Give the gun to Ian or any of the others. I dont care, I said, my voice slow and even. Just leave the boy out of this.Jebs sudden face-wide grin reminded me, strangely, of a pounc ing cat.Its my house, kid, and Ill do what I want. I always do.Jeb turned his back and ambled away overmatch the hall, whistling as he went. I watched him go, my mouth hanging open. When he disappeared, I turned to Jamie, who was wat elevateg me with a sullen expression.Im not a child, he muttered in a deeper tone than usual, his chin jutting out belligerently. Now, you should you should go in your room.The order was less than severe, but there was nothing else I could do. Id lost this disagreement by a large margin.I sat down with my back against the rock that formed one side of the cave opening-the side where I could hide behind the half-opened screen but still watch Jamie. I wrapped my fortification around my legs and began doing what I knew I would be doing as long as this insane website continued I worried.I also strained my eyes and ears for some sound of approach, to be ready. No matter what Jeb said, I would prevent anyone from repugn Jamies guard. I would give myself up onwards they asked.Yes, Melanie agreed succinctly.Jamie stood in the hallway for a few minutes, the gun tight in his hands, unsure as to how to do his job. He started pacing after that, back and forth in front of the screen, but he seemed to feel silly after a couple of passes. Then he sat down on the floor beside the open end of the screen. The gun eventually settled on his folded legs, and his chin into his cupped hands. After a long time, he sighed. Guard duty was not as exciting as hed been expecting.I did not get world-weary watching him.After maybe an hour or two, he started looking at me again, flickering glances. His lips opened a few times, and then he thought better of whatever he was going to say.I displace my chin on my knees and waited as he struggled. My patience was rewarded.That planet you were sexual climax from in front you were in Melanie, he finally said. What was it like there? Was it like here?The direction of his thoughts caught me off guard. No, I said. With only Jamie here, it felt right to speak normally instead of whispering. No, it was very different.Will you manifest me what it was like? he asked, cocking his head to one side the way he used to when he was really interested in one of Melanies bedtime stories.So I told him.I told him all about the try out Weeds waterlogged planet. I told him about the two suns, the elliptical orbit, the gray waters, the unmoving permanence of roots, the stunning vistas of a thousand eyes, the endless conversations of a million soundless voices that all could hear.He listened with wide eyes and a fascinated smile.Is that the only other place? he asked when I fell silent, trying to think of anything Id missed. Are the See Weeds-he laughed once at the pun-the only other aliens?I laughed, too. Hardly. No more than Im the only alien on this world.Tell me.So I told him about the Bats on the Singing World-how it was to live in melodic blindness, how it was to fly. I told him about the Mists Planet -how it felt to have thick white fur and four hearts to keep warm, how to give claw beasts a wide berth.I started to tell him about the Planet of the Flowers, about the color and the light, but he interrupted me with a new question.What about the little green guys with the triangle heads and the big black eyes? The ones who crashed in Roswell and all that. Was that you guys?Nope, not us.Was it all fake?I dont know-maybe, maybe not. Its a big universe, and theres a lot of company out there.How did you come here, then-if you werent the little green guys, who were you? You had to have bodies to move and stuff, right?Right, I agreed, surprised at his grasp of the facts at hand. I shouldnt have been surprised-I knew how bright he was, his mind like a thirsty sponge. We used our Spider selves in the very beginning, to get things started.Spiders?I told him about the Spiders-a fascinating species. Brilliant, the most incredible minds wed ever come across, and each Spider had three of them. Three brains, one in each section of their segmented bodies. Wed soon enough to find a task they couldnt solve for us. And yet they were so coldly analytical that they rarely came up with a problem they were curious enough to solve for themselves. Of all our hosts, the Spiders welcomed our occupation the most. They barely discover the difference, and when they did, they seemed to appreciate the direction we provided. The few souls who had walked on the surface of the Spiders planet before implantation told us that it was cold and gray-no wonder the Spiders only saw in black and white and had a limited sense of temperature. The Spiders lived short lives, but the young were born knowing everything their parent had, so no knowledge was lost.Id lived out one of the short life terms of the species and then left with no desire to return. The amazing clarity of my thoughts, the easy answers that came to any question almost without effort, the march and dance of numbers were no substitut e for feeling and color, which I could only vaguely understand when inside that body. I wondered how any soul could be content there, but the planet had been self-sufficient for thousands of hide years. It was still open for settling only because the Spiders reproduced so quickly-great sacs of eggs.I started to tell Jamie how the offensive had been launched here. The Spiders were our best engineers-the ships they made for us danced nimbly and undetectably through the stars. The Spiders bodies were almost as useful as their minds four long legs to each segment-from which theyd realise their nickname on this planet-and twelve-fingered hands on each leg. These six-jointed fingers were as thin and strong as steel threads, capable of the most delicate procedures. roughly the mass of a cow, but short and lean, the Spiders had no trouble with the first insertions. They were stronger than humans, smarter than humans, and prepared, which the humans were notI stopped short, midsentence, when I saw the guileless sparkle on Jamies cheek.He was staring straight ahead at nothing, his lips pressed in a tight line. A large force out of salt water rolled slowly down the cheek approximate to me.Idiot, Melanie chastised me. Didnt you think what your story would mean to him?Didnt you think of warning me sooner?She didnt answer. No doubt shed been as caught up in the storytelling as I was.Jamie, I murmured. My voice was thick. The sight of his overstretch had done strange things to my throat. Jamie, Im so sorry. I wasnt thinking.Jamie shook his head. S okay. I asked. I wanted to know how it happened. His voice was gruff, trying to hide the pain.It was instinctive, the desire to lean forward and wipe that tear away. I tried at first to ignore it I was not Melanie. But the tear hung there, motionless, as if it would never fall. Jamies eyes stayed fixed on the blank wall, and his lips trembled.He wasnt far from me. I stretched my arm out to brush my fingers against his chee k the tear spread thin across his skin and disappeared. acting on instinct again, I left my hand against his warm cheek, cradling his face.For a short second, he pretended to ignore me.Then he rolled toward me, his eyes closed, his hands reaching. He curled into my side, his cheek against the hollow of my shoulder, where it had once fit better, and sobbed.These were not the tears of a child, and that made them more profound-made it more sacred and painful that he would cry them in front of me. This was the melancholy of a man at the funeral for his entire family.My arms wound around him, not fitting as easily as they used to, and I cried, too.Im sorry, I said again and again. I apologized for everything in those two words. That wed ever found this place. That wed chosen it. That Id been the one to take his sister. That Id brought her back here and hurt him again. That Id made him cry today with my insensitive stories.I didnt drop my arms when his anguish quieted I was in no hurry to let him go. It seemed as though my body had been starving for this from the beginning, but Id never understood before now what would feed the hunger. The mysterious truss of mother and child-so strong on this planet-was not a mystery to me any longer. There was no bond greater than one that required your life for anothers. Id understood this truth before what I had not understood was why. Now I knew why a mother would give her life for her child, and this knowledge would forever shape the way I saw the universe.I know Ive taught you better than that, kid.We jumped apart. Jamie lurched to his feet, but I curled closer to the ground, cringing into the wall.Jeb leaned down and picked up the gun wed both forgotten from the floor. Youve got to mind a gun better than this, Jamie. His tone was very gentle-it softened the criticism. He reached out to tousle Jamies shaggy hair.Jamie ducked under Jebs hand, his face scarlet with mortification.Sorry, he muttered, and turned as if to flee. He stopped after just a step, though, and swiveled back to look at me. I dont know your name, he said.They called me Wanderer, I whispered.Wanderer?I nodded.He nodded, too, then hurry away. The back of his neck was still red.When he was gone, Jeb leaned against the rock and slid down till he was seated where Jamie had been. Like Jamie, he kept the gun cradled in his lap.Thats a real interesting name youve got there, he told me. He seemed to be back to his chatty mood. Maybe sometime youll tell me how you got it. Bet thats a good story. But its kind of a mouthful, dont you think? Wanderer?I stared at him.Mind if I call you Wanda, for short? It flows easier.He waited this time for a response. Finally, I shrugged. It didnt matter to me whether he called me kid or some strange human nickname. I believed it was meant kindly.Okay, then, Wanda. He smiled, pleased at his invention. Its gracious to have a handle on you. Makes me feel like were old friends.He grinned that huge, cheek-stretc hing grin, and I couldnt help grinning back, though my smile was more rueful than delighted. He was supposed to be my enemy. He was probably insane. And he was my friend. Not that he wouldnt kill me if things turned out that way, but he wouldnt like doing it. With humans, what more could you ask of a friend?